Last night, while enjoying cocktails with a few single ladies and discussing the ills of online dating, I received an e-mail from a gentleman. All it said was "Hi." Poetically simple. Even more simple than the OTHER two e-mails that he has sent me in the last 3 days, both of which said "Hi honey." I have never e-mailed a response.
His e-mails were not what made him newsworthy, however. His profile is what drove me to write this post. First, he's from Albany, so I'm not even sure why I'm on his radar. Second, as I prepared to write this post, I noticed that he was last online at 4:53 a.m., which seems an odd time to be surfing the interwebs for a date. Thirdly, his picture revealed a face that looked as if it might belong to a pedophile. But what really stunk of crazy was the actual content of his profile. It was so ludicrous, so poorly written, so completely full of obvious lies, that I felt it must be featured in this blog. Here are some of it's finer points:
- I workout 6 days a week , pump iron and walk 5 miles a day.
- I am into vitamins and herbs and good whole foods.
- I like to ride horses when i can .
- i am veteran U.S. army 101st airborne, secret and top secret security clearance.
- I play guitar and sing and also a song writer and I also write screenplays.
- I am into helping people which gives me sense of purpose.
- i am a mechanic and auto body mechanic and i restore classic cars and sell them, i also own rental property.
- I am also an actor and i have acted in films in California, i have one agent in nyc.
- I have studied law , no i do not have a law degree, but i do not need one.
- I am looking for a good friend , perhaps a loving caring relationship if i can find her and just maybe she will look at me with loving eye's and say to me, your really swell,,,,,LOL
I think the "LOL" at the end is my favorite part...
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